Some Things are Not Meant To Be

Sometimes things happened when you least expected it to happen. And when it did happen, it takes a lot of 'siu1 yang3' in oneself to be able to cope with it maturedly. Events that occured lately do impact me in one way or another, it really hit me hard that in this world, there are full of MEAN, NASTY people who will walk into your life at one point or another and give you a hard time.

Like a friend who was there when I needed someone yesterday, told me, 'Just let him be the person who just come and go in your life. Why must you be sad about the whole thing? Feel sad for him that he is acting this way!'

Very true indeed. Why must we allow others to control how we act of feel? I told him, 'sometimes a smile or some words that a person says to me can MAKE MY WHOLE DAY. So the my day can also be ruined just because of what some people do or say. I am, after all, human.'

'It is alright to haver reactions over what is said or done, but then, why care about him? The next time he does that, just smile and walk away. Be indifferent. At the end of the day, he might come up to you and ask ,' hey u angry at me ah?'

Thank you to this new-found friend of mine, there are many more days for us to get to know each other better.

Anyway, do you remember back then in primary school, some outspoken, attention-seeking guys will like to tease you and another guy? I remember myself always talking to jy, a guy who is good in maths coz we 2 are always 'competing' for the 3rd place in class(the 1st two placings are more or less fixed) and that we also represented class or school in maths.

He is a very nice person and he has taught me many things, including algebra. Come to think of it, the last time we talked was when he called my house on the day SPM results was out. It was indeed a pleasant surprise to me. He congratulated me upon seeing my name in the newspapers. Later on, I found out that his appeal to JPA succeeded and he is now doing engineering sponsored by JPA. It is a pity we don't keep in touch; time does change things. And fate has its own way to work on us; an ending may just be a new beginning.

Ok back to the story. So this attention-seeking guy always like to tease me about jy. The more i get 'angry' and tried to clarify, the happier and shiok he gets. He could come up with marvellous story and then spread it to the whole class. He also made fun ofm y surname, soo, by calling me 'susu' and a lot of other sick jokes related to susu. =(
So you see, the more attention I paid to him, the more he liked to tease me.

And when I was standard 6, he, wf (the attention-seeking guy) invited me to his birthday party in his house. Apparently I was the only girl being invited. He added that I could ask any girl to come along since I didn't want to be the only girl. So I asked jann. Then the next day, the whole class was talking about wf only invited his 3 hengdais and me and another girl to his birthday party. They said that he told his hengdai, 'remember to invite your ah sou.' What a jerk.
In fact, he is the typical guy who cares about how he looks, good basketballer, plays the guitar, doesn't hand up homework at times- he is remembered for all the wrong reasons.

Yet, as time goes by, I saw the good sides of him- having the brotherhood thingy, remembering that I mentioned I like 'titanic' and he printed the pics for me (at that time, internet wasn't very common. However, I was a foolish girl to think that if I accept that, it means I like him too. So i declined his goodwil)l, and how he remembers that I can't really take spicy food.

Oh well, it is all memories now. I liked him when he was about to stop liking me, because I made him stop liking me by behaving differently to him. This is because initially, I didn't like him in that sense and I was hoping that all the rumours would come to an end. Thus, I occasionally 'raised my voice' to him so that he would stop liking me. Haha I know everyone is laughing now. Childish it is, but that was kind of like my first major crush, besides the really good friendship/grey area-ship (more like admiration) that I had with jy back then.

Now that I look back, I am so GLAD wf and I never kept in touch and got together. wf only got worse in secondary school, he is everything that I DON'T LOOK FOR in a guy- he doesn't really care about his studies, wears a bit lala-ish, likes to go to sg weng for girl-watching, uses foul language. In short, we are from different spheres, we cannot communicate, let alone be compatible with each other. So you see, everything happens for a reason.

Which is why i believe that some guys in my life should just leave me alone since we are not compatible in the friendship sense. It is fate that we are mere acquaintances. So can you please give me due respect and stop bringing tornodoes or hurricanes in my life as and when you feel like it?

We are all civilised adults; and you do not know me that well. So do not judge me. I beg you not to. You do not know the whole story so do not attempt to make me in the same clique as you. I believe that in every organisation, there is no 100% unity. As long as there is some extent of unity when the circumstances demands, people who are professional will abandon all their private and personal grudges aside for the sake of the whole team. So be rest assured. Let's sign the peace treaty.

I will constantly remind myself about what that friend of mine told me-be indifferent. I was proud that my EQ has been increased as I did not break down yesterday. I am counting my blessings. ^_^