The 'Wow' Factor in Guys

Thanks to sam who showed me THIS ARTICLE that speaks right to my heart, I decided to share it with you all.



"Girl meets guy. Thinks he's good-looking. Gets to know him. Decides he's a creep. Asks herself, 'What did I ever find cute about him?"

"How about this one? Girl meets guy. Doesn't think he's particularly good-looking. Gets to know him anyway — maybe they have the same friends and keep bumping into each other.
Surprisingly, comes to like him. Says to herself, 'Gee, he's a lot cuter than I thought.'

The 2 situations above are so true indeed!! Both happened to me!! Like I said, what makes me fall for a guy is 'the aura', NOT the looks though there must be an initial attraction that makes me want to know him better. ^_^

Professor (Prof): Attraction and relationship develop together. Maybe it's different in the animal world. There, I suppose, if you look okay, or smell okay, you're in. With us, it's the other way around. If you're in, you start looking okay. Even 'physical attraction' isn't purely physical.

Girl: So you're saying that if I meet a guy and he doesn't look like Jude Law, I should give him a chance anyway, because he might look better to me when I get to know him.

Prof: Something like that. Besides, looks go through fashions, just like clothing does. Today, girls think Jude Law is cute. When I was a kid, they thought Rock Hudson was.

Prof: There is something edgy about maleness. Something aggressive, something that pushes, something that wants to be strong. Seeing this, your friend asks 'Given a choice between a guy with an edge and a guy with no edge, I take the guy with an edge.' Am I right so far?"

Girl: Yes. But it scares her.

Prof:That's because she hasn't asked the second question."

Girl: I'll answer for her.

Prof: All right. Let's set aside the guy with no male edge; he's out. But there are different kinds of edges. So we ask, 'Given a choice between a rusty pocket knife and a diamond-edged sword, this time which do you take?

Girl hedged. "What are you calling a pocket knife and what are you calling a sword?"

Prof: Think of it this way. That edgy male quality has to be sharpened, polished, and oiled, right? As with any good blade.

Girl: suppose so."

Prof: So much depends on how well the sharpening is done. When the edge turns out well, you get confidence; when it doesn't, you just get attitude. When the it turns out well, you get courage; when it doesn't, you just get stubbornness or moodiness. When it turns out well, you get a man on fire to protect the weak; when it doesn't, you just get one who wants to use them.

Girl: You're too late, Professor.

Prof: What do you mean?

Girl: The women of my generation were raised not to languish in towers, looking for knights on white horses.

Prof: I don't know what you mean by languishing in towers, but I do know this. If you want that male edge, and you run away from knights, you'll end up running after punks.

She hesitated. "You may have something there. But —"

Prof: But what?

Girl: I don't know any young knights.

Prof: At your age, most of them would still be in training. In the middle ages they were called 'squires.

Girl: I don't know any squires, either.

Prof: Are you so sure that you'd recognize one if you met him?

Girl: Why wouldn't I?

Prof: A good man's blade is usually sheathed.

Girl: I'm getting lost with all these metaphors. Speak English.

Prof: You're attracted to that male edge. All right, that's natural. You should be. But the right kind of edge takes longer to discover. The qualities that are the most obvious are often the most superficial, and you have to give a guy a long enough chance to learn what kind of man he really is."

I remember telling sai meng back then in college that one of the qualities I look for in 'the one' is 'wen3 zhong4'. (loose translation: reliable, matured). He answered me back, 'wen3 zhong4? How old are we know wo? That comes with age!'

So I guess what this article says is right-you need to give guys some time to mature, to get that 'edge'. Perhaps I am meeting some squired now, I hope I can tell the squires apart from the crowd of commoners. haha.